"Tony Soprano sings!" Don't you think that alone would have been enough to get asses in seats to see Romance and Cigarettes? How about "Christopher Walken sings!" "Kate Winslet talks dirty!" "John Turturro dances!"? Admit it, you're now curious, aren't you? And yet, MGM thought John Turturro's musical Romance and Cigarettes was so unmarketable that they let it sit on the shelf for two years and are now only giving it a very limited release in a few theaters before shuffling it off to DVD. After it debuted at some festivals in 2005 and played Toronto that same year, Romance and Cigarettes became a Hollywood urban legend. It looked for awhile like the people lucky enough to see it at those fests would be the only ones who ever would. People spoke in hushed tones about how awkward and poorly executed the project was, and a DVD release seemed likely. But here we are, reviewing Romance and Cigarettes in theaters, making 2007 a year that actually saw two musicals starring Christopher Walken. It's been a weird twelve months.

So, did Romance and Cigarettes deserve to be buried under the weight of dozens of other festival movies that never found a wide release (some fest movies never even find their way to DVD)? The short answer is no. There's far too much creativity in Turturro's blue-collar musical vision to deny the film the cult audience it deserves, but the sad fact is that you can see from the very first scene what scared marketing executives enough that they tried to whack the film like one of Tony's hits. Creative energy will only get you so far. If you don't know how to craft it into something cohesive and give the audience something to care about, you'll lose them. Except for a few moments of energy courtesy of the always-great Kate Winslet and a scene-stealing cameo by Elaine Stritch, Romance and Cigarettes just never comes together.

Nick Murder (James Gandolfini) is one of those guys who can't wrap his head around the fact that the two things he loves - sex and smoking - could get him killed. The first has gotten him into some hot water with his wife Kitty (Susan Sarandon) because Nick has fallen for the sexually charged redhead Tulla (Kate Winslet). Meanwhile, Nick and Kitty's daughters (Mandy Moore, Aida Turturro, and Mary-Louise Parker) are standing by their mother’s decision to kick Nick out of the house, and Momma's even brought in her cousin Bo (Christopher Walken) to deal with the woman who's torn her family apart. All of this blue collar drama takes place in a jukebox musical world where people break into already-established songs like "Delilah" by Tom Jones or Bruce Springsteen's "Red Headed Woman," and everyone has a penchant for group dancing. Imagine "Piece of My Heart" sung with a church choir with Susan Sarandon taking lead. Imagine "I Want Candy" sung in a Jersey backyard. At the heart of the film is Turturro’s valiant (and perhaps in vain) attempt to graft the fantasy usually associated with musicals onto the kind of working-class family drama that would normally avoid even a reference to an all-singing, all-dancing extravaganza.

Romance and Cigarettes is a clever idea, poorly executed. There’s passion, melodrama, and all the other emotions usually associated with musicals in this blue collar world, but Turturro can't seem to figure out how to blend the two worlds seamlessly as a writer or director. When Sarandon bursts into "Piece of My Heart," it not only doesn't feel natural, it feels strangely unnatural, like everyone involved was unsure of themselves. Ironically, for a movie that was shelved because it was deemed too bizarre for the masses, Romance and Cigarettes actually doesn't go far enough. It only takes off like it should when Winslet is on-screen, giving another one of her scene-stealing turns as a redhead that almost any man would have a tough time turning down. Gandolfini, Sarandon, Parker, Moore, and especially Turturro as a writer and director all hold themselves back as Winslet turns it up to eleven, showing you the movie that Romance and Cigarettes could have been if everyone took a chance and followed her lead. Singing Sopranos is a fun concept, but a little more risk-taking and a lot more confidence really would’ve given this New Jersey operetta some sorely needed bada-bing.