It's pretty easy to see that when it was originally written, The Bucket List by Justin Zackham, had its comedic heart in the right place. But it took two of the best working actors in Hollywood and a director who hasn't just lost his creative energy, as much as made us wonder if he ever had any at all, to take that well-meaning concept and turn it into the generic, insulting film that's opening in theaters today. The Bucket List works in fits and starts, mostly due to the incredible talent of its two leads, but it inevitably falls prey to Reiner's obscenely manipulative heartstring-pulling and the undeniable sensation that Jack and Morgan could do this sort of thing in their sleep (which may explain their involvement in the first place). Rather than "The Bucket List," a more appropriate title for the film might be "Coasting" because that's exactly what Morgan, Jack, and Rob are doing (though Reiner could be accused of doing that for the last decade or so). The irony of it all, considering the message of The Bucket List, is that when the obituaries for all three of these Hollywood legends is written, this film won't even merit a footnote.

One of many flaws of The Bucket List lies in the very set-up of its story, a plot that seems to imply that, if you're dying of cancer, the best thing that could happen to you would be to make friends with an eccentric billionaire. (Finally, a solution to the health care crisis! Democrats, take note.) How else would you be able to traverse the globe, jump out of planes, and come to terms with your own mortality just in time to die unless you had gobs of limitless cash at your disposal? How DO the poor do it? The billionaire in question is Edward Cole (Nicholson), the head of an HMO (of course), who lands in one of his own hospitals dying of terminal cancer. Sharing the bed next to him is the far-more-humble Carter Chambers (Morgan Freeman), a mechanic who seems to have a profound answer for everything and sounds a bit like God. (Does Freeman even care about being typecast anymore?) How WILL this wacky odd couple ever get along? After a few false starts, the main plot of The Bucket List kicks in as we watch Edward and Carter work through the titular creation - a list of all the things each character wants to do before they die. Despite its cliched setup, it's not a bad idea for a movie. Its execution, however, is a whole different story.

Nicholson and Freeman rarely give what could be called bad performances, but The Bucket List feels like something they both should have realized was far too easy for actors as accomplished as they are. Each gentleman almost feels like they're doing an impersonation of themselves, complete with Jack's devilish grin and Morgan's overly profound narration. (It might have been more interesting if they did impressions of EACH OTHER. That would've been worth ten bucks.) The parts may have seemed challenging and complex on paper, but on the big screen, they're just a mish-mash of the predictable habits of two actors that we know all too well.

And then there's Mr. Reiner. Has there ever been a tale of two careers as drastic as that of the former Meathead? His output in the first half of his career - This Is Spinal Tap, The Sure Thing, Stand by Me, The Princess Bride, When Harry Met Sally..., Misery, A Few Good Men, and even The American President - were examples of a director who really knew how to craft believable dialogue and characters into moving stories. Since then, he hasn't made a single film that felt real. If his film output started with North, Ghosts of Mississippi, The Story of Us, Alex & Emma, Rumor Has It..., and now The Bucket List, his career wouldn't have a second half to dissect. All of Reiner's later films have almost completely lost their touch with reality, routinely choosing manipulation over emotion and predictability over character development. What happened to Reiner in the early '90s and where his talent seems to have gone will be one of the great mysteries of cinema history.

If Rob Reiner is to have a third act and rescue himself from his career doldrums, it's not going to start with The Bucket List. Far from the worst film of Rob, Jack, or Morgan's career, but even farther from the best, The Bucket List feels like nothing more than afterthought for everyone involved. It should be for you too.