The first two episodes of the second season of FX's widely divisive Dirt are called "Welcome to Normal" and "Dirty Slutty Whores." Guess which one works and which one falls flat? If you saw season one, you know that "Normal" barely plays a role in the world of DirtNow Magazine and its notorious editor Lucy Spiller (Courtney Cox). Is it normal to get stalked by your brother and then stabbed by a once-aspiring actress who you helped ruin while you were sleeping with her boyfriend? Only in the soap opera world of Dirt because that's how the first season ended. If you haven't caught up on the guilty pleasure of Dirt, check out the first season on DVD and you'll soon realize that the season premiere is the 'odd episode out' of the entire series to date. The addictively ridiculous behavior returns in the second episode, "Dirty Slutty Whores," but it feels like creator/writer/director Matthew Carnahan made a crucial mistake with the second season premiere - he took his creation seriously.

No offense to Carnahan - we're one of the few sites that has praised Dirt as one of the more enjoyable guilty pleasures on TV - but his work on the second season premiere (he gets writing and directing credit) feels like an argument with a tabloid journalist trying to make a case that he's just as 'important' as any other newspaper writer. "Welcome to Normal" features the aftermath of the stabbing that ended last season, as well as the introduction of a new character, and the implication that the meds may finally be working for schizophrenic paparazzo Don Konkey (the show-stealing Ian Hart). Sure, Dirt had to deal with some serious issues from the end of last season, but did it have to be so dull? Watching Lucy and Don seriously deal with their issues brings Dirt into the realm of other television dramas and it just can't compete in that arena. As soon as Dirt asks you to take it seriously, the entire thing falls apart, for the simple reason that we don't read Us Weekly for the same reason we read The New York Times.

But we still read it and, luckily, Dirt returns to its sleazy form in the second episode, "Dirty Slutty Whores." Dirt is at its hilarious best when it pulls straight from the tabloid headlines and, after getting the serious stuff out of the way, the second episode of Dirt this season tackles not one, not two, but three of the more ridiculous stories of the last twelve months - Alec Baldwin's phone call, David Hasselhoff's drunken meat-eating, and Paris Hilton's makeover during her time in jail. All in one episode! Tom Arnold plays a very bad father who first hears a nasty voice mail message go public and then sees a video pop up online of his drunken, Hasselhoff-ian behavior and the team at DirtNow try to get to the bottom of how these personal moments are being made public. Meanwhile, a celebutante spends time in jail and comes out looking a lot more refined and conservative than she once did. Of course, it's all an act and the team at DirtNow are ready to tear down the facade.

The idea that Dirt could rip its tabloid stories directly from real-life is a great twist for the show, which was clearly inspired by true events in season one, but seems to be more direct about it this year. It's like Law & Order for the tabloid set, and that sounds like a great guilty pleasure to those of us who feel like these tabloid stories could use some ridiculing. Clearly, the start of season two of Dirt struggles a little bit to find its feet with two wildly different episodes (and two was all we were sent early) and with a strike-shortened season, this could be an awkward sophomore outing for the Cox show. As long as Cox, Carnahan, and their team continue to produce such over-the-top soap opera as the majority of season one and the second episode of season two, we'll keep buying this tabloid TV. We just might not tell our friends about it.